(Hang) Clean & Jerks and Two-Thirds Karen

A. 3 Hang Clean + 1 Jerk x3 (add weight each set)

Three consecutive hang squat cleans without dropping the bar, then finishing with a single jerk.
Got up to 165.

Clean & Jerk from the floor 1-1-1, max effort
175-185-195

I stuck to squat cleans.  My last jerk was ugly. 

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B. “2/3 Karen” For time: 100 Wall Ball

 

4:39

Christmas Crusher

Teams of two. Partners will alternate tasks with only ONE partner working at a time.For example:Partner A rowPartner B wall ballPartner A BurpeesPartner B row

20min AMRAP:250m Row20 Wall Balls 14lb/20lb 20 Over the erg burpees

I partnered with Steve and Raichel, with Steve and I working simultaneously. 

We got six rounds, plus 100m rowed. 

Push Press and the Rest is Burpees

 A. Push Press 3-3-3-3

135-155-175-185 (PR)


B. “The Rest is Burpees”
5 rounds, starting every 4 minutes:
Each round is 25 reps total
- Max reps Front Squat (BW )
- Burpees (remaining reps up to 25)
Score is total reps of front squats.

Curse my 185lb body.  I ended up with a total of 38 front squats. 

I think my reps for each round were this:

11-9-7-5-6

I suck at dodgeball

We played dodgeball.  Sounds fun, right?

Well, remember one of the basic tenets of CrossFit is "Our fun is not fun."

Everytime you get eliminated, you have to do 25 of a designated exercise, depending on the colour of the ball that eliminated you.  Push-ups, squats, sit-ups or burpees. 

I kept getting nailed by the damn push-up ball.  It basically looked like the scene in Dodgeball where the dude from the ``I`m a Mac.``   ``I`m a PC.`` ads kept getting drilled. 

Nonetheless, our team, the Purple Cobras, won three games to two. 

2012 Team Games workout #8

With a team (I had Steve and Michelle)

30 GHD or weighted situps
30 DL 225/135lb
30 Double-unders
30 OHS 95/65lb
30 Pullups
Athletes only advance once the station ahead is clear

I thought DUs would provide a nice little respite in the middle of this WOD.  Not for me, though, as I went second behind Steve and, other than a few seconds on the deadlifts,  he didn't leave me a lot of time for waiting around as he blazed through each station and was long gone before I could get there. 

The DLs were the hardest.  I did them in sets of 10, 5,5,5.  I did okay on the OHS, though, with sets of 12, 10, and 8.  

Our team was done in  18:19

Clean and Jerks / American Turkey Burn

A. Clean and Jerk 1-1-1

The WOD actually called for single-rep snatches but I thought better of that.  Did this instead. 

295-205-215F

Aaron reminded me on one of my later lifts to finish my jerk with my shoulders.  It worked so well I kinda nailed myself in the throat on my next lift. 

I actually failed on 215 twice.  I might have got it up the second time if I could have got under the bar better. 

B. “American Turkey Burn”

10 rounds for time:
40 single skips
15 heavy bell swings to shoulder height (70/55)
10 toes to bar
7 pushups

This was in honour of American Thanksgiving.  I didn't feel very thankful for this WOD. 

My goal was just to get through it.  T2Bs and push-ups and I have never gotten along too well.

Actually, when it came down to doing this WOD, the PUs didn't bother me as much as, well, any of the other stuff. 

This took me 31:07 (I think... it was 31:something anyway) and in the end I was just thankful it was over. 

Front Squats, "A Dozen Minutes"

A. Front Squat 1-1-1, heavy single

225, 245, 260F, 260F

This isn't the first time I've failed miserably trying to break my PR of 255.  I've gotta stop thinking that 255 was easy and I should just go up from there.  From this point on, I'm gonna pretend that 245 is my PR. 

B. “A Dozen Minutes”

 

 

AMRAP in 4 mins – wall ball 20/14lb

1 minute rest

AMRAP in 4 mins – row (for calories)

1 minute rest

AMRAP in 4mins – double unders

 

Did fairly well on the WB (77) and the row (64) and then underperformed with my new speed rope on the double-unders  (125) for a mediocre score of 266

I may kind of suck at CrossFit, but I rock (at) paper scissors

A. Rock Paper Scissors Warm-Up

Pick a partner, play rock paper scissors, and the loser of each hand has to do a small amount of exercise

• 5 burpees
• 10 jumping jacks
• 20 mountain climbers
• plus some other shit I can't remember. 

I paired up with Kim Fe, who warned me that she is awesome at RPS.    Then I proceeded to KICK HER ASS.    Well, actually, we tied for the first 5 (or maybe 7... whatever it was, it was amazing) rounds, so we both had to do it.    Kim: "What's disturbing to me is how much my brain works like Tyler's."   Then in the next six rounds, I won 4, she won 1 and we tied once.   And I SUCK at RPS.  

Best warm-up ever. 

B. KB Snatch Ladder 55/35

10-1 10L,10R,9L,9R……..1L,1R

Not for time.  This was tough.  I haven't mastered the KB snatch so that the KB doesn't whip around and smash the back of my forearm.  By the end, I just snatched it so the bell would stay upside down.   Obviously, this resulted in a couple situations that could have resulted in brain trauma.  But, hey, my wrists feel fantastic!


C. Circuit Mania

Three rounds, one minute at each station

(45 seconds of work, 15 seconds of rest)

1- Med Ball Cleans
2- Sledge Hammers
3- Rope Battle
4- Atomic Push ups  (Do a strict pushup, bring your feet up to your hands like you're doing a burpee, then kick them back out; don't actually stand up, jump or clap)
5- Sandbag transfer /45
6- Ring Support Holds


Points-wise, the big money here was in the rope battle.  I scored 146 in my best round (I think... there was a lot of counting here).  Sandbag transfer, on the other hand, I scored a 5. 

Keenan wasn't concerned about the scoring, but if you were to do this for a competition, you'd want to weight it.  Maybe make each sandbag transfer worth 5 points, and divide the rope battle points by 5.

Assuming I didn't screw up on the counting of the rope battle rounds (that's a big assumption) my total score was 671.  

I liked this WOD in that it incorporated a lot of things that we don't do all the time at CFR.

 

Are you ready for some football?

CrossFit Football game

• Touchdown (6pt): 80 Squats, 40 Kettlebell Swings, 30 Pull-Ups, 20 Burpees
• Convert after TD (1pt): 50 Double-Unders (or 125 Single-Unders) 
• Field Goal (3pt): 20 DB Thrusters (2x45lb), 30 Sit-ups, 20 Box Jumps (20″)

Two 15 minute halves with 3 minute half-time. Work is divided between teams of 2, only one person works at a time. Skipping is not divided, both must complete.

 I teamed with Nathan (Team name: "Nat-Ty By Nature") and we split the work evenly. 

First half: FG, TD, FG, FG = 16

Second half: four FGs = 12 

Total score 28. 

We were three box jumps away from another field goal.  We barely fell short, just like the Riders. 

I think the best strategy for this is to go for field goals.  The DB thrusters do suck total donkey scrotum, but you and your partner can do alternating sets of 5 and that makes it bearable. 

You might want to do one TD when you're fresh, but when you're tired, those double unders will be a total time-killer unless you and your partner are total DU ninjas. 

I had done a slightly easier version of this before and scored a 26... but it sounds like I was a bit hungover at the time. 

Fine, Double Unders, be that way. See if I care.

A. Power Clean & Jerks, on the minute, for 15mins


65% x1x5, 70% x1x5, 75% x1x5

Basically, you do one clean and jerk per minute for 15 minutes.  For the first five minutes, you do 65% of your one-rep max C&J.  For the next five minutes, you use 70% and for the last five you do 75%
 

I thought my max clean and jerk was 215, but it's actually 210.  I probably would have ended up using roughly the same weights, though, so whatever. 

140lbs
150lbs
162lbs 

I didn't find this terribly challenging.  I like C&J's. 



B. Modified NW Regional WOD 2010

3 rounds for time:
10 Overhead Squats – 95/65lb
50 Double-Unders

Once upon a time, I considered myself fairly proficient at double-unders.  Now, they seem to kill me, cardio-wise, and really bring down my WOD results even in relatively small numbers like in this WOD.

I'd like to blame it on my fraying rope (which will be replaced before I do another DU WOD) or the fact that I was wearing my flat-soled Airwalk Chuck Taylor knockoffs and not my cross-trainers,* but the fact was that the DUs just sucked the life out of me during this workout. 

*It's a poor carpenter who blames his tools, fucko. 

I actually was more worried about the overhead squats during this workout, due to my bum shoulder.  I actually considered upping the weight and doing front squats or back squats.  I decided to go ahead with the OHS.  I felt them, but did the first two sets unbroken.  I broke up the last set, but that was more due to fatigue than shoulder issues. 

I suppose it's possible I haven't really regressed all that much on DUs (though some recent Rhiannon results would seem to indicate otherwise). Maybe it's just that a bunch of people at CFR are just that much more advanced at them. 

Whatever it was, I was more than two minutes slower than the fastest times of the day, which is a pretty fucking big gap on a short workout.   I mean, this wasn't the worst time of the day, but it was pretty mediocre and below my expectations.

6:57. 

Lost my nerve on Back Squats, found my mojo on "Jackie Lite"

A. Back Squats 3-3-3


I came into the gym thinking I'd try to break my three-rep record of 290, but for whatever reason, as I progressed through the lifts, I decided to stop at 275.   It seemed pretty heavy to me. 


B. “Jackie Lite”

For time:
1000m Row
50 Push Press 65
30 Pullups

Looking at the times earlier in the day, I was a little unsure about what kind of time I should expect to get.  Many of the times ranged between 9:00 and 10:00, with a few in the , but I thought I could break 9:00 if I finished the row in under 4:00, the push press in 3:00 and the pull-ups in 2:00. 

My goal with the rower was to maintain a good pace but not go so hard that it would wreck me for the rest of the WOD.   I managed to strike a good balance there. I was off the rower and started the push press by 3:50 or so. 

As it turned out, the push-press went a lot quicker than I expected.  I did them in sets of 25, 14 and 11, and it took a little over a minute to finish it.  I like doing relatively light push-presses.  I've got a pretty good rapid-fire technique down pat, plus my short arms give me an advantage because the bar has to travel less distances. 

Just don't ask me to get anything off a tall shelf for you.  #Midgetpower

I think I took right around two minutes to do the pull-ups. 

Final time was 7:07, which was briefly good for top EFS* score in the gym until Uncles and Chase beat it in the last session of the day.   Fuckers.  Where do they get off, being all strong and fast and in shape?

*EFS: "Except for Shae."  Shae's time on this was something ridiculous like 5:55.   

CrossFit ClusterF--k largely averted

Yes, it's been five days since I last hit CrossFit for a WOD.  But I've been shovelling a shitload of snow in the last three days, so I should get some credit for that, right?   ANSWER ME, EXERCISE GODS!!!!

“Remember Me” Chipper for time:

11 Deadlifts – 275
11 Burpees
11 KB Swings – 70
11 Burpees
11 Overhead Squats – 115
11 Burpees
11 Chest-to-Bar Pull-ups
11 Burpees
11 Box Jumps – 24″
11 Burpees
11 DB Squat Cleans – 2×45
500m Row

11 Thruster – 135
11 Double Unders
11 Power Clean – 135
11 Double Unders
11 Handstand Push Ups
11 Double Unders
11 Toes to Bar*
11 Double Unders*
11 Push Press 115
11 Double Unders
11 Snatch – 115
500m Row otherwise


Yes, that is all in one workout.  It's a hefty amount of work, but not insane by CrossFit standards.  As the oldest, crotchetiest CrossFitter in attendence, my biggest concern going into this WOD was finding space to do all the shit we needed to do in a gym that was full for the 4pm class.  There was also separate workout going on for those people doing the Accelerated Competition Training.  This WOD required the following:

• 275lb barbell
• 135lb barbell (which, with a pair of 35s and 10s could be converted to a 115lb)
• Box
• Pair of 45lb dumbells
• Space to do burpees without worrying that someone doing overhead squats is gonna dump a bar on your head

Honestly, I thought this had the potential to be a total CrossFit ClusterFuck. Once we got going, we stagger-started enough that it wasn't so bad, so I think Leya gets some credit for that, as do the other athletes for being patient and considerate.

It would be interesting to do this WOD in a big, empty gym or field with all the equipment laid out in a sequential order.  I doubt it would help my time a huge amount, but it might make a bit of difference. 

I finished at 33:34 and rested for a few minutes and then the Boy wanted to go do some of his Daddy-assisted pull-ups.  (He grabs the bar, and I give him enough of a lift to get his chin over the bar without him having to exert so much energy that he isn't able to brag about how strong he is.) 

It was then that it occurred to me that I had skipped the Toes-to-Bar and the double unders that were supposed to follow it while doing the WOD. 

AAAGH! 

So I did them. If you add the time it took me to do that plus my previous time (and ignore the several minutes I spent resting, which is what I'm going to do for the sake of future comparison purposes) I think my time is more like 35 minutes a a result. 

"20-plus minutes of Tyler hating life"*

We did a group warm-up that was a nice change of pace from my usual wandering around doing random squats and a few sit-ups and pull-ups when the mood strikes.  It was stuff like inchworms, shuffles, bear crawls, butt-kicks, high knees, walking lunges+stretch, etc.

Then it was time for a metcon CFR entitled “Did someone say Cardio?” but that I more accurately described as "20-plus minutes of Tyler hating life."  

This was nasty. 

Five rounds
60seconds at one station, 30 seconds of rest in between
-Burpee suicides
-Row for calories
-Double Unders

I ended up with 324 which was on the low side compared to others I usually match up well with. 

As I said on the CFR site, I did not gameplan this one for maximum scoring at all.  I went balls-out on the burpee suicides and the rowing, so I had very little left in the tank for double-unders, which is where the highest scoring potential was. 

The most DUs I got in any minute was 40

Also, I didn't pace myself very well for a five-round WOD.

Still, at the end of it all, I just wanted to lie in a puddle of my own sweat.  I guess that means it was a good workout. 


*Alternate title for this blog post:

"High scores aren't everything," says the guy with the low score


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When it comes to band names, "FUN" < "Barski Cleans" or "Burpee Suicides"

A. Barski Cleans: 75% x 3 x 5 sets


It's so weird, the right arm (elbow and shoulder) that have been giving me issues, even when not CrossFitting, feel FANTASTIC after doing cleans of any kind.  I think I will start doing cleans in my warm-up, even if it's just a few reps of 155 or so. 

Anyway, I liked doing these Barski cleans.  They're basically like three hang squat cleans in a row, but only using a really small dip on the clean.  Doing this helps you focus on getting down and catching it in a squat. 

I used 165. 


B. Burpee Suicides

5 yard distance

Start on one side, which is touch side, run to other side burpee side. Complete one burpee and run back to touch line. AMRAP Burpees in 5 minutes.

I did 48 in the 5:00 which I would classify as pretty good, but not great.  I would've been thrilled with 50.  By about 90 seconds in, I was hating life. 


And, just because I've had this song in my head for DAYS now, and sang badly along with it prior to the start of the burpee suicides, here's "Some Nights" by FUN.

     

So apparently, not going to the gym and eating shitloads of candy makes you fat? Why didn't anyone tell me this?

My gym attendance lately has been awful.  It's not that I don't want to do CrossFit, I've just got some stuff going on in my life.  Mainly, my in-laws have moved in with me, and the associated moving, cleaning and organizing that goes along with that took up a bunch of time that would normally be spent at CrossFit.

Even if I ate relatively well, the absence of regular exercise would have me defaulting to fat, but lately I've been living on a diet that consists of between 50 and 80% of Halloween candy, depending on the day.  I've also been a bit sleep-deprived. 

So, yeah, I'm getting dangerously close to "fat fuck" territory again.  

I've got to switch gears.  I went back to the gym Saturday, Nov. 3 and would have gone the following day, except I showed up and they were doing yoga.  I would have joined in but I wasn't in the right frame of mind.  Maybe one of these Sundays I will join in on it, though.

Saturday's group WOD was a re-run of something we did recently, except this time we had to do TWO rounds instead of one. 

Again, I didn't notice until I was almost done the first round.  That sucked.

For time, TWO rounds of:

20 Calorie row
30 Burpees
30 Dumbbell ground-to-overhead (45lb / 35lb)
30 Toes-to-bar
35 Overhead stationary lunges (45lb plate / 25lb)
50 Double Unders

My team, the Superstorm Dandies, got this done in 39:32

Back Squats and Rowing Sprints

A. Back Squats 1-1-1
 
The lift of the day was actually snatches.  I'm trying to rest my right arm, which seems to be helping sweet fuck all; I'm running out of options that don't involve me seeing a doctor, a physiotherapist or a teary-eyed farmer with a shotgun who wants to "do right by ol' Tyler."

Anyway, I did squats instead.  In between, I goofed around a lot.


285-295-310 (PR)



B. Rowing Sprints

500m x 5.  Rest two-four minutes between.  Or more.  This shit is hard, yo.


1:40, 1:41, 1:42, 1:49, 1:52


By the last one, I was just coasting.  I didn't set any PRs on this one, but it may have been my fastest-ever average over five sprints, because I didn't have the massive drop-off until later.  I'm not going to do the math to figure out.  Fuck math.

Max Clean and Jerk / Angie to the Max

A. Max Clean & Jerk 3-2-1-1-1

 

135x3, 155x2, 185x1, 205x1, 210x1(PR)

 

 

B. “Angie to the Max”

 

2 rounds of 2 minutes AMRAP each of:

• Pullups
• Pushups (not exactly modified, but, as Leya pointed out, they were substandard and shitty ... though I don't really blame her*)
• Situps 
• Squats

I really need to pay better attention.  I thought this was two minutes of Tabata for each of these exercises and didn't realize that it wasn't until I looked up at the clock. 

Then when I fiinished the squats on the first round, I thought I was done.  I sat down and started adding up my results, glad it was over.  Then I realized everyone else was back doing pull-ups. 

Knowing I had to do another eight minutes of this was a very unpleasant wake-up call.

 

Total reps, if I did the math right, was 363. 

Overheard at the Gym:

"My God, Leya, your shins! You should wear socks.  Not to protect your shins.  To protect me from having to see your shins."
-Me.

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C&J Waves then "Jump, Jump"

A. Clean & Jerk waves  

(70%x2, 75%x1, 80%x1) x 3

I used 145 as my 70%, 155 as my 75% and 165 as my 80%

We do three sets of this, transitioning quickly between the weights and resting in between sets.

Done.  Got nice and sweaty. 



B. “Jump, Jump!”

For time:
100 double unders
15 deck squat jumps
75 double unders
10 deck squat jumps
25 double unders
5 deck squat jumps

7:36.  Not a stellar time.  It might be time for a new speed rope.  My current one is frayed and it gets snagged on my shorts on failure.

Front Squat / "Sweaty Med Balls"

A. Front Squat 1-1-1 (work up to heavy single)


225-260(FAIL)-245-250(FAIL)


B. “Sweaty Med Balls”

Buy in: Run 400m w/ MB – 20/14lb

21-15-9

Med ball Squat Cleans
Wall Ball Push Press (no squat)
Med ball Jump overs (ball facing)
Buy Out: Run 400m w/ MB

12:25

Team Okotoks

Team Okotoks

In teams of 4 (2 men and 2 women):
600m run by both males in tandem
25 OHS 65# by both females, each (men rest)
25 OHS 95# by both males, each (females rest)
80 burpees in 8 sets of 10, each athlete does sets of 10 in order i.e. 1,2,3,4,1,2,3,4
25 KBS 55# by both females, each (men rest)
25 KBS 70# by both males, each (females rest)
600m run by both females in tandem

18:50

"I'm, like, 72 per cent hetero"

The quote in the headline refers to the fact that I'm quite comfortable calling another man handsome or remarking on his awesome abs.  (Looking at YOU, Mr. Joel Uncles.)

A. Back Squats 3-2-1-1-1

I did 185(3), 225(2), 255, 275, 295, 305 (PR~!)


B. "Cindy" (but with sit-ups)

Decided to give my right arm a rest and do something about my gut at the same time, so I subbed the push-ups with sit-ups. 

20 minute AMRAP
5 pull-ups
10 sit-ups
15 air squats

Got 17 rounds plus 5 PLU and 4 SU. 

Team WOD

10:00 am: Team Workout (and ACT)


For time:
20 Calorie row
30 Burpees
30 Dumbbell ground-to-overhead (45lb / 35lb)
30 Toes-to-bar
100 foot Overhead walking lunge (45lb plate / 25lb)
50 foot Sprint



Teams of 4 (ideally 2 men, 2 women). All four athletes perform the entire workout. The first athlete enters and completes the Row. When that athlete has completed the row, they move on to Burpees, and the second athlete may begin the Row. This pattern continues, in order, through all of the movements. No athlete can begin their next station until the athlete ahead of them is clear from that station. A team’s result is the total time for all 4 members to go through the workout.

I have no idea what our team's result was. Wait, that's not true.... It was... nope.  Can't remember.   I was slow on the T2B and Hated (with a capital H) the walking lunges. 

"I've got a bad feeling about this" and The Boy rows 1100m

A. Leg Pistol Practice 15-25 reps


I'm starting to get okay at these.  I can do them with both legs now.  Some kind of minor groin strain affected my ability to do them with my right leg (which is the one that needs the most improvement) but I managed to squeeze a few out. 

B. 1500m Row for time.

I figured that if I managed to get sub-6:00 on this, I'd be happy.  I did a bit better than that and completed it in 5:28.3, which was one of the better times of the day up to that point, and one I was pretty happy with.  Anytime I'm within 10 seconds of Shae on anything, I'm not gonna complain.   I've never been a particularly strong rower and being only 5-9, I don't have any particular physical gifts in that area.  I think it was just that I found the right pace and stuck with it.  I took a momentary breather at around 1100, but it was short and then finished it off. 

C. Push-ups and Double Unders:

For time: 75 Pushups.  Each break do 20 Double Unders.

This video pretty much sums up my thinking going into this.   



Yeah.  After experiencing virtual push-up impotence while getting it on with "Age-Adjusted Angie" last week,I had visions of having to do something like 600 DUs while trying to get through this WOD.  75 push-ups isn't that big of a deal, normally, but they're pretty much my biggest issue with my shoulder right now. 

It wasn't quite that bad, but I did have a pretty frustrating moment at the end. See if you can guess what it was. Here's how this WOD broke down for me. 

16 push-ups
20 DUs, in sets of  2+14+4.  Nice way to start, huh?
12 push-ups, for a total of 28
20 DUs
13 push-ups = 41 total
20 DUS
10 push-ups = 51 total
20 DUs
10 push-ups = 61 total
20 DUs
8 push-ups = 69 total
20 DUs
5 push-ups = 74 total  "I can't do one more? Are you fucking kidding me?!?" 
20 DUs
1 push-up. 

Time: 9:59


Afterwards, the Boy came out of the playroom and wanted to exercise.  We did some of the usual stuff. Burpees, squats, jumping ring pull-ups.   He did assisted box jumps on a 20" box (he jumps while holding my hand, I give him a pull to help him get a bit higher.

Then, he hopped on the rower. I told him to go for 200m.  He did that and kept going.

"You wanna go for 300?" "Yeah!"  

After 300, he didn't show any signs of stopping.

As he approached 500m, I was encouraging him.  "You're doing awesome.  Don't stop until you get to 500."

"I'm not gonna stop until I get 1000!"

I thought that was typical 5 year old bravado, and maybe he was trying to impress Alana who was rowing next to him (he's into blondes), but he kept going.  And going. And he hit 1000!

Then he kept going some more, and I'm thinking I don't want this kid to injure himself.  And, besides, it's after 7pm and I need some supper.  So I let him hit 1100 and then stop him.  He got a nice round of a applause from the CrossFitters and Kim Fly wrote his name on the whiteboard for the first time.

Cleans then Row/Burpees

A. 2 position Squat Cleans
@ 75% (floor/knee)+ Jerk on 2nd Clean, x5 sets

-Take 75% of your max clean (either squat or power).  In my case, this was 160lbs.
-Do a squat clean.
-Don't drop that bar! Your work ain't done.
-Do a hang squat clean.
-Finish with a jerk. 
-Rest a minute or so. 
-Repeat four times.

Done.




B. Row/Burpees

For time:

1000m row
50 speed burpees
500m row
25 speed burpees

11:29

Within 3 minutes, do 30 unbroken box jumps (20″), must step down.

Done.   Although the "within 3 minutes" thing is open to interpretation.  I took it to mean that you had to start it within three minutes of finishing the WOD, which I did.  (started at 2:59)    I'm pretty sure I took less than three minutes to do all 30 jumps, so I'm covered that way as well.

However, if it meant that we were supposed to COMPLETE it within three minutes of finishing the WOD, well, good fucking luck with that.

Team WOD

Teams of four, one person working at a time:

250 pull-ups
250 bell-swings
250 double unders
250 overhead squats (m-95lbs)

I teamed with Derek, Michelle and Cheryl.  Keenan made me captain, even though I was the shortest person on the team, so I dubbed us "Team Napoleon Complex." 

We got done this in 35:50, I think.

The last time I did this, I think I did too many of the team's pull-ups, and it fucked me over for weeks. 
This time we spread the work out pretty evenly, but Derek did do a bit more than the rest of us. 

Wait... we're supposed to do TWO rounds?!? What the Hell?!?

A. Front Squat
Heavy single 1-1-1, then 90%x2, 85%x3x3


225-245-260F


B. “Skippidy-do-dah”

2 rounds:
100 single skips
10 Hang Power Snatch 95/65
50 Double Unders
15 Ring Dips
25 Crossover Skips
20 Hang Power Clean 95/65

As I was finishing this circuit in around seven minutes, I couldn't figure out why my time was going to be so much better than everyone else on the whiteboard. 

Then I looked over and noticed that we were supposed to do TWO rounds. 

Fuck. 

I finished my second round at 17:59. 

”Age-Adjusted Angie”

A. ” Age-Adjusted Angie”


100-age pullups

100-age pushups

100-age situps

100-age squats

  I had to do 64 of everything.  12:56.  All I know is that my right shoulder is fucked, and push-ups were more brutal than ever.  I did most of this in sets of four or three. 

Clockless CLOC #5

Yesterday's WOD at CrossFit Regina was back squats and then "Helen."  My lower back was sore for most of the day so I decided that I wasn't going to chance further aggravating it. 

Instead, I decided to to CLOC #5 from last week:

15 power cleans @ 115lbs
30 double unders
10 power cleans @ 135lbs
30 double unders
5 power cleans @155lbs

There were various groups doing various things around the gym, and  clock was already running, so I started doing the WOD on my own. 

I neglected to let either of the coaches know, so Keenan re-set the clock while I was about 90 seconds in.  He was extremely apologetic, but honestly, he did me a favour. 

I was thinking I'd get finished this WOD in under 5:00 and I might even threaten the 4:00 mark if my DUs were on. 

They weren't.  AT ALL.

Despite the fact that I didn't have a clock running, I was trying to get it done as quick as possible.  But I couldn't string together more than 10 DUs in a row for the most part.   And the more inept I was at them, the more pissed off I became.  And the more pissed off I got, the worse my DUs became.  By the end, I was a hapless-skipping rage monster. 

I don't know how long this took me, but it's very possible I wouldn't have made it under the 7-minute time cap.

"Two is Company"

Partner a does a 1k Run, Partner b does an AMRAP of
2-Burpees
4-Bell swings 55/35lb
6-Pull-ups

Partner b continues til Partner a returns, and then they switch-Partner a does AMRAP and Partner b runs.

Then Partner a does a 1k Row, Partner b does AMRAP of
2-Wall Ball – 20/14lb
4-High Pulls with kettle bell 55/35lb
6-Abmat Situps
Partner b does AMRAP til Partner a rows 1k, and then they switch-Partner a does AMRAP and Partner b rows.


I partnered with Steve.  We got 21 rounds in 20:52.  I'm not sure if that's good or not. 

Fran

21-15-9

Thrusters (95lb)
Pull-ups

It had been almost exactly two years since I had last done the standard Fran workout.  (Note: I re-read my blog post from back then and holy shit do I take myself way too seriously sometimes.) 

I was still pretty sore from the WOD on Wednesday so my expectations were not great that this would be the day I would finally break 5:00 on Fran.  I tried doing a few thrusters when warming up and they got heavy after, like, three reps so that didn't exactly boost my confidence, either.

I'm writing this three days later, so don't remember a ton of what happened once the actual WOD started but here are some highlights from my fuzzy recollection:

• 21 thrusters - I did 11 straight, rested with the bar on my chest, did another four, rested again, did one more and then had to drop the bar.  Obviously, it wasn't as efficient as it could have been.
• 21 pull-ups - I think I did 12 uninterupted, then five and four. 
• Finished the first round in about 1:40ish

• 15 thrusters - Sets of eight and seven.  I know in the past I had to split these into sets of five, but I think that was because I had burned myself out in the first round by doing both sets uninterrupted.
• 15 pull-ups - Rapid singles, briefly touching my feet to the ground, but not letting go of the bar for a bunch of them at the start.  I must have stepped away from the bar at some point, and probably more than once, to give my hands a rest. 
• Finished the second round at about 3:30ish.

• 9 thrusters - sets of five and four, I think.  I can't remember.
• 9 pull-ups - As I got near the end, I remember thinking: "Okay, don't fall off the bar this time, dumbass. Especially since you're doing this on the 8-foot bar over a box."

"TIME!"


4:50.  PR 

Even though my first sub-5 Fran time comes about three years too late, I'm still happy about it.  It had been a longtime goal.

Days like this are when I really love CrossFit. 


.

A. CLOC#3

In 10 minutes find:  1RM Push Press, then 1RM Front Squats.
10 minutes max for both, racks allowed for both.

I like these kind of  competition WODs.  Several times, with the benefit of a a decent warm-up, I have a new PR.  Maybe short amount of time actually helps generate some adrenaline or nervous energy or something that helps the lift.  Plus, I don't have too much time to psyche myself out.

For the push press, I started out at 165, then did 185 and 195 (one-rep PR by 10 lbs)

For the front squat, I can't remember what I did.  Probably 225, 245, and then 255 (one-rep PR by 5 lbs)

Total: 450bs



B. CLOC#4 = Chipper

50 Wall Ball – 20lb to 10′ for guys
40 Overhead Lunges – 20 per leg with 25lb plate for guys
30 Box Jumps – 24″ for guys
20 Push-ups
10 Toes to Bar

7:03.  This is an okay time a bit faster than I expected.  Some other guys just killed this WOD... I think Uncles had some crazy time like 4:44.   It was weird not having the clock on the wall showing where we were at time-wise for this WOD (it was being used for another group doing CLOC #3) and not having any idea how fast or slow I was going.  I'm not sure if it helped or not.  I'd like to think I could have pushed a bit harder if I knew I had a shot at being sub-7.   Or maybe knowing that I was going faster than I expected would have made me complacent.

Cleaning my CLOC

A. Power Clean 3-3-3, Squat Clean 3-3-3


Power clean 155-185-205 (3-rep PR)

Leya did her best to correct my suspect form and shoddy footwork, and I actually had a couple of decent lifts at 185.  Then the weight got heavy and I started spreading my feet way wide on the 205s.  Got 'em up, though. 
Squat clean 135-155-175 (3-rep PR)


B. CLOC#1* 

*This WOD is part of the 2012 CrossFit Ladies of Canada challenge. 

2 rounds for time of:
1000m Row
30 Air Squats
15 Burpees onto a 45lb plate (guys)

We could have done a bonus third round, but I opted out, like most people.  This was plenty. 

I wanted to keep both my rows under 4:00.  I was well under that for the first one, probably 3:35 or 3:40ish but was just over for the second one.  Because the end was near, I think I completed the squats and burpees quicker in the second round, though. 

12:51

Like the salad dressing, hate the WOD

Looks delicious, huh? Well, the WOD that shares a name with this dressing sent me into a weekend-long shame spiral.

“Thousand Islands”

10 Burpees

1000m Row

10 Burpees

1000m Run

10 Burpees

1000 Skips

10 Burpees

33:47.  All I know is that it took FUCKING FOREVER once I got to the 1000 skips.  I couldn't do more than 50 straight without my feet protesting that I was hurting them, so there were a lot of breaks. 

I belatedly realized,after already doing more than 600 skips, that I could skip faster than I had been and it didn't seem to affect my cardio or discomfort (could still get 40-50 consecutive skips in a set before my feet started to call Amnesty International) so I guess that's something to keep in mind for next time. 

Another BCBD WOD - "30/20 Chipper"

30 Pull-ups
30 Jumping Squats
30 1 arm Dumbbell Shoulders to Overhead (5L/5R)  35lbs
30 Burpees (onto bumper plate)
30 1 arm Dumbbell Snatch (Alternating) 35lbs
20 Burpees (onto bumper plate)
20 1 arm Dumbbell Shoulders to Overhead (5L/5R)
20 Jumping Squats
20 Pull-ups

I'm a dumbass so I not only lost count of my burpees several times during the set of 30 but also forgot to do the first set of jumping squats until after I had done the burpees. 

This took me 13:50. 

BCBD WODs

I'm not going to the Bridge City Beatdown this year, having missed the opportunity to sign up when in Vegas.  But we still get to try some of the competitions. 

A. BCBD SAT WOD#1
4 minutes to find 5 rep max Clean – FOR MAX WEIGHT
Start with an empty bar. You have to load your own bar, and you have 35 seconds to complete the five reps once the bar leaves the ground.

I like WODs like this, and they are far less nerve-racking outside of the competition. 

Started with 145.  Then I did 165.  I had more than a minute left so decided to go to 175. 

175 actually felt better than 165.  I feel like there was some room left for me to go up. 



B. BCBD FRI WOD#1
50 ft shuttle x 22 lengths – FOR TIME

Start behind a line, run around a pylon 25 feet away, come back behind the line and touch both hands on the ground.  Sounds easy.  Sucked by the 11th rep.

2:17. 

Press, Deadlifts, Rhiannon

A. Shoulder Press 3-3-3

 

Ended up with 135. 

 

 

B. Deadlift 1×5

275


C. “Rhiannon”
Max Double-Unders in 10 minutes

300.  Not my best.

"Lawless"

For time:


40-30-20-10 reps of:

Wall Ball – 20lb
Box Jumps – 24″
Pull-ups
Double-Unders


So that adds up to 100 reps of each exercise, which is decidedly un-fun.

Thankfully, I didn't tear my sissy hands on the pull-ups.  That's probably because I took way too many breaks. 

D3 blew past me somewhere in the 20s and ended up finishing more than a minute ahead. Considering the 20s and the 10s were supposed to be the quick rounds, that shows just how slow I was moving at that point.  He was pounding out multiples of pull-ups and box-jumps while I was doing singles. 

27:27, rx'd, and I'm not unhappy with that time. 

"Isabel"

The family was in Calgary for a week, which allowed me to do a little CrossFit tourism and sneak in a WOD at one of the local gyms. 

I went to CrossFit Athlete Inside, and did the benchmark girl "Isabel."

30 snatches for time (135lbs)

What I really liked about this was the fact that Coach Kevin led the group through a really extensive warm-up, focusing on the pull from the ground, working up to weights heavier than we'd be using in the WOD. 

Kevin and one of CrossFit AI's firebreather athletes Tim did their best to help me refine my spazzy snatch technique and footwork, but there's only so much you can do in an hour. 

Still I managed to knock 91 seconds off my previous time, even with a shoulder that's been giving me some issues. 

6:45, rx'd. 

Dumbass

A. Bench Press 3-3-3-3


115 - 135 - 145-155- 165


B. Metcon = The “Expendable”

150 Double Unders
5 Front Squats (1/2 Body weight, for me that's 95 lbs)
5 Pull ups
10 Front Squats
10 Pull ups
15 Front Squats
15 Pull ups
20 Front Squats
20 Pull ups

I didn't exactly do it in this order, though.  I missed the rounds of 15, called "Time," then wondered how the hell I passed Jarvis who was way in front of me ("Hmm, he must of been really slow on his front squats.")

Then I looked at the whiteboard and realized I went from the 10s to the 20s. 

Dumbass.

10:58

Burpee/KB Metcon

It's a 10-min AMRAP combined with an every minute on the minute WOD.  Two types of awful for the price of one!
Here's the deal:
We do one burpee on the first min, two on the second, etc.
With the time remaining in each of the minutes, we swing a kettlebell until it feels like our arms are going to fall off. (These are not the official instructions, BTW).

Your score is the number of KB Swings.

Because I am the World's Laziest CrossFitter and not particularly gifted athletically, I usually try to gameplan WODs to maximize my score with minimal effort.   But this one was hard to gameplan. 

I figured I would get tired later, so the smart thing to do was to try to maximize the swings early on, when I had the most time. 

It mostly worked, I think.  

As the number of required burpees got higher,  I went slow during those in an effort to catch my breath to do a quick burst or two of bell swings. 
127, rx'd.

"Kelly"

Five horrible, disgusting rounds of:

400m run
30 box jumps 24"
30 wall balls

34:02  I wasn't thrilled with that time.  Then I reminded myself that getting mad over something like this is pretty lame. 

Gotta earn that Serburger

I knew I was going to the Serbian Club for lunch today, so when the alarm went off at 5:30a.m., I got up and went to the gym. 

What do these two things have to do with each other? 

Well, the Serbian Club's specialty is a garlic-laden monstrosity known as the Serburger.  It is so enormous they don't even give you the option of fries on the side.



No, this is not an illusion and I don't have a teeny-tiny face.  That is just one big frickin' burger.  


Obviously, one session of CrossFit wouldn't be enough to counter the total impact of a Serburger, but it's at least putting up an effort. 

Today's WOD was an eye-opener.   

A. “Kettleballs”
50 Wall Ball
15 Kettlebell Swings
35 Wall Ball
30 Bell Swings
20 Wall Ball
45 Bell Swings

Took me 12:32.  That felt like a long time.  I took too many breaks and the breaks were too long.  Please excuse me as I go hang my head in shame for a moment. 

. . .

Okay, I'm back. 


B. 1200m Run (600m x 2)

"Hey, you know what would feel awesome after 100+ wall balls?  Running 1.2km!"
-No one, ever

I kept up with Dana for maybe 100m before my legs were like, "Yeah... that's not happening, pal.  Sorry."

6:05. 

Tabata and running

A. “Tabata This”

Don't judge me because of my crappy, mid-WOD penmanship.  Judge me because of my pathetic push-up totals.

(tabata = 20 seconds on, 10 seconds off)

4 mins each of:

Pullups - 62 total

Pushups - 55 total

Situps - 81  total

Squats - 118 Total

Final score was 316.  That's within striking distance of the last time I did this in December (333), but it's still lower across the board.  Well, I am slightly older and fatter since then. 


B. 1km Run, 400m Run, 200m Run


1km - 4:43   Hey, you know what feels great after doing more than 100 squats?  Me neither, but it sure as fuck isn't a 1km run.

400m - 1:29  I was off to a nice lead on this one until the home stretch, when a dude named Frazier (who had destroyed everyone in our group on the 1km) blew past me like I was standing still.  That actually hurt my feelings to the point I slowed down slightly.  He also has a fantastic head of hair, so I am doubly envious.

200m - :51   I did NOT want to run anymore by this point.

.

“The Trooper-ish” and Double Unders

“The Trooper-ish”
800m Run

15 Snatches – 135/85lb (Advanced do 155/100lb)

400m Run

30 Front Squats – 155/105 (Advanced do 205/145lb)

*Add your own weight onto bar, must take bar from floor
Time cap =20 minutes


I used the 135 for the snatches, but thought I could handle the 205 front squats. 

Wrong.  After six reps, and two cleans, it was pretty clear I wasn't going to finish if I kept that much weight on the bar.  I lightened the weight to 155, and even with that, it wasn't a sure thing that I could get it done under the time cap.


3 scores:

1. 800m Run time   3:29

2. # of Front Squats in first set   3
3. Overall time (or if unfinished, time cap + 1 second for every unfinished rep)  18:58


B. 3 sets of Max Double-Unders

46, 49, 55 (PR)
I broke my previous DU PR of 53, which was nearly two years old. 

Rack Jerks and "Nasty Girls"

A. Rack Jerks 3-2-1-1-1


135x3
165x2
195x1
215x1 (FAIL)
215x1 (FAIL)


B. “Nasty Girls” 3 rounds for time:

50 Squats

7 Muscle-Ups (Sub 3 pull-ups/3 push-ups per MU)

10 Hang Power Cleans – 135/95lb



I can't remember .  Maybe 15:29? 

"Tyler? Are you gonna make it?"

"Christine"
Three rounds, for time, of:

500m row
12 Bodyweight deadlift (185lbs because I'm a fatty)
21 Box Jumps  20"

13:40 (PR)

I was completely spent afterward.  Like, someone-asking-me-if-I-was-going-to-live kind of spent.  I'd say who it was, but I actually don't know, because I was in a state of exhausted, post-WOD delerium, so grateful for the opportunity to just lay on the black floor mats and NOT HAVE TO EXERCISE ANYMORE. 

(Actually, we were supposed to do weighted pull-ups afterward, but I had to get back to work, so I skipped out on those.  They would have just damaged my self-esteem, anyway.)

Writing this 24 hours after the fact, I just realized that this is a one-second PR for me.  Before doing the WOD, I consulted the Sissy Hands Archives for my previous Christine results, but I didn't read carefully.  I had done it with 135 lbs in 13:14 years ago, but my best recorded rx'd time was 13:41.   When I did this last December, it was 13:57.

 

You jerk... less weight than you want to

A. Power Clean & Push Jerk 2-2-1-1-1


My last successful single was 185lbs.  I cleaned 205lbs, but failed the jerk on two separate tries.  Because it was a strict push jerk, I didn't allow my legs to split.  If I had, I'd like to think I probably could have done it, as I've jerked that weight in the past.  (Sour Grapes Alert!!)

B. “Head Over Heels” NOT for time

12 Handstand Push-Ups

10 Shoulder Touches

8 Wall Shuffles

6 Inverted Toes to Floor

"That's the most blood I've ever seen from double unders."

Today was sort of an interesting day at Crossfit, for a number of reasons.

Firstly, I was the only person who showed up for the 2pm class. In my four years at CrossFit Regina, that might be the first time that ever happened. I've done workouts with just one other person, but doing it all by myself is a different vibe. 

The workout was the "Newport Crippler"  then a ten minute rest, and concluding with a half-Rhiannon.

Newport Crippler (30 x bodyweight squats, then a one-mile run)

My previous time doing this WOD had a time of 10:03, but reading my description of that day makes me believe that I overachieved a bit. I was shooting for a sub-11-minute time today.

I used a 185lb barbell. I did my squats in sets of 15-10-5, just like last time, but I think I was really lacking some urgency. I didn't finish them until 2:49.   I bet I did them in less than two minutes last time. 

The run was s-l-o-w. Making matters slightly more interesting was the fact that as I was trudging along, a cop car drove past me no fewer than four times.

When I stumbled into the gym at 11:14 elapsed, they drove past in the alley and told Aaron that they thought I might have been someone they were looking to arrest, until they realized I was from CrossFit.

Actually, if I was a criminal, CrossFit would probably come in handy.  Running from the po-po, carrying TVs, pulling yourself up to second-storey unlocked windows, jumping over fences, that sort of thing.

CrimeFit, anyone?

There's a new CrossFit affiliate in Regina called CrossFit Villains, so maybe they're trying to capitalize on that underserved market of scofflaws looking to increase their functional fitness. Or maybe what makes them "villains" is their criminally bad website design.  (C'mon, fellas, that badass industrial-looking background makes it a chore to read the actual, y'know, words on your website.)


Half-Rhiannon (five minutes of double unders) 

In my third set, of double unders, I whipped myself pretty good on the arm, right smack dab on a scab on my left elbow that I acquired via rug burn during an impromptu submission grappling match between Harlan and me during the last UFC pay per view. (BTW, I tapped the Big German out, no matter what Harlan says or was captured on video by spectators that night.)

The ensuing bloody mess prompted the quote from Robin that you see in this blogpost title.   My double unders kinda fell apart after that, though I wouldn't blame the boo-boo as much as I would blame being really, really goddamn tired.

153 double unders in five minutes

Push press, dead lift, metcon

A. Push Press 3-3-3-3

115-135-155-170(1)


B. Deadlift 1×5 (+5-10lb from 120713)

265. It had been a while since I deadlifted, and I thought it wise not to push things.


C. “Run, Clean, Sit”
400m Run
21-15-9 Med Ball (or Sandbag) Clean 45/20
Abmat Situps
400m Run

6:10, I think. I'm writing this two days later, so I could be wrong.

Overhead squats and awful, awful sled drags.

A. Overhead Squats  5-5-5

145-155-170F

I was strong enough for the 170 and did two reps, but a little moment of instability was too much for my right shoulder and its nagging injury to deal with.  I'm starting to wonder if I should get this looked at. 


B. Sled Drags 5 x 100m

This was awful. (weights only reflect the plates on the sled, not including the sled)  

70-90-115-135-170-180

On the last one, I wanted SO BAD to stop, just for a second for basically the entire final 50m  But there were a few people watching, so I kept moving at my glacial pace.

Vegas: Two WODs, comely wenches and a brush with 50 Cent

From the lack of activity on the blog, it looks like I've been skipping workouts.  That's only kind of true. 

Tracey and I were in Las Vegas from July 16-20, and I managed to sneak in a couple of workouts in between downing huge slushy alcoholic beverages in souvenir glasses and testing the upper limits of my gluttony at expensive casino buffets.

Both my workouts happened at CrossFit Max Effort.   It's actually in the same facility as what used to be CrossFit Las Vegas, which I went to when we went to Vegas three years ago, but the owners of what was CFLV split up.  Zach got the facility and the other guy got to keep the name.   I was considering trying at least one other affiliate when I was down there, but CFME was really easy to find, and $30 fee on Tuesday covered Tuesday's WOD, a t-shirt, and a return trip on Thursday if I wanted.  Considering I had to take a cab to the gym, I thought it was a pretty good deal. 

On Tuesday, I pulled up in a taxi and was greeted curbside by a rush of Aussie chicks wearing CrossFit shirts.  I think they were looking for a way to get back to the Strip.

When they opened the door, I asked them if the CF gym was around the corner. 

"Yes!  And 50 Cent is on the sidewalk!"

Turns out that Fitty was giving a talk to some Boys and Girls Clubs in the sports complex that houses CFME and he was out front surrounded by a bunch of little kids wearing blue t-shirts. 

Of course I didn't have my phone or my fucking camera with me, so I was unable to get a photo with him.  He posed for a group pic with the kids and I briefly considered photobombing it and asking someone to e-mail it to me.  I would have stood out, because I would have been the only white person in the picture. 

The WOD? Oh yeah, it involved 5 sets of 5 reps each of weighted good mornings, weighted pull-ups, and bench press. 

I don't remember my totals offhand, but I think it was 145, 35 and 145 respectively.  I know I failed a couple of times on the bench at  155 on the fourth and fifth rep. 


On Thursday, I decided to go back.  As a warm-up, I wanted to walk from my hotel at Caesar's, mid-Strip, as far north as I could on the Strip where I could still find a cab in front of a hotel. 

I set out about 10:30am.  It was already pretty warm, and it's a pretty decent hike to the Excalibur.  I got there a little after 11am so I had some time to kill in the lobby of the hotel.  I was wandering around when a couple of girls dressed like medieval wenches grabbed me and pulled me over to take pictures with them. 

"Okay, you get down on one knee like that, I'm gonna put my thigh here on your shoulder, while she sits on your knee."

"For this next one, I'll bend in front of you, and you pretend to spank me."

They were set up there with the idea of luring unsuspecting and horny tourist rubes into these photo-ops, then selling the souvenir pics at $25 each. 

Not that I would pay for that anyway (I may be a rube, but I'm  a cheap rube) but when I looked at the proofs, all I could see on my green T-shirt were two HUGE sweat stains where the straps of my backpack had been.  It was pretty gross and not a memory I would pay to cherish forever. 

Sorry, wenches. 

Of course, now that I think back, I wish I HAD taken a picture of how gross I looked. 

The Thursday WOD was seven sets of snatch doubles.  Nicole was our instructor and earlier I had been watching her snatch (hey-oh!!).  She had some pretty sweet form, and was snatching around what I would be doing, which was especially impressive for a woman who is visibly pregnant.  (If by some incredibly small chance she's reading this, oh God, I hope I'm not wrong about that.)

I think I did sets of  95-115-135-140-145-150 and failed on my second at 155. 


Of course the two trips to CFME and all the walking I did in Vegas (there is so, so much walking you have to do to get anywhere) did very little to counter the fact that I was drinking jumbo margaritas for time and destrominating buffet tables. 

I definitely got my fill of Las Vegas.

2012 Games team chipper

In teams of 4 (our team had 3) for time: 30 GHD situps 30 Deadlifts 225/155 (our team did 185) 30 Double Unders 30 Overhead Squats 95/65 30 Pullups Athletes start in a conga line with the GHD situps. Athletes can’t advance stations until station in front is clear. BONUS!: After time is called, each team member then does max 50m suicide sprints with sled and for every 10m, it knocks a second off the team's time. We finished this in 14:29. I did 300m of 80lb sled drags. Jarrett did 1000m, which made me look like a pathetic little puss.

Dumbbell complex

A. Unilateral Dumbbell Complex

4 rounds, NOT for time:
5 Snatch – L – 55/35
5 Push Press – L
5 Bent over Row – L
5 Swings – L
5 Goblet Squats
5 Snatch – R
5 Push Press – R
5 Bent over Row – R
5 Swings – R
5 Goblet Squats

Rest 90 seconds.

I used a 45 lb dumbbell. Easier than using a kettle bell, and I'm the World's Laziest CrossFitter.


B. Handstand shuffles length of wall x4

Done.

Snatch and "CrossFit Triathalon"

A. Hang Squat Snatch

3-2-1-1-1

Ended up at 135lbs
I was not happy with my technique.  I just lack confidence to catch it in the squat. 

B. “CrossFit Triathlon”

For time:

800m Row

800m Run

200 Double Unders


I got done the row in under 3:00, was back from the run around 7:25, and took forever on the DUs.

13:18. 

Filthy Fifty - "There's a reason they don't call it Happy Fifty"

For time:
50 Box jump, 24″
50 Jumping Pull-ups
50 Bell Swings, 35/25lb
50 Lunges
50 Knees to Elbows (overhand grip)
50 Push Press, 45/35lb
50 Back Extensions (sub=Good Mornings 45/35lb)
50 Wall Balls, 20/14lb
50 Burpees
50 Double-unders

31:33 (PR)

There is so much about this WOD to hate.  I do not like knees-to-elbows, and the burpees were like pure torture.  On the 16th burpee, I went down and stayed down.  I contemplated having a little nap. 

I did the DUs in two sets of 25, which sounds good, but in between those sets I rested long enough to watch a sitcom.

I beat my very old PR by about two minutes, but I think the old one was set using strict burpees.  Not sure how much of a difference that would have made today.  Maybe a lot, I dunno.

Happy Fun Ball

I am not particularly good at this game, yet I usually end up on winning teams.  

We played in front of the Leg today, and Team "TomKat" (in honour of the end of the Cruise-Holmes marriage) dominated the "Late Bloomers." 

What the hell is a deck squat?

A. Sandbag 800M 65lb

Running with a 65lb sandbag gets old real quick.  I suppose it's a good example of a functional exercise (carrying something awkward and sort of heavy over a medium distance as quickly as you can), but that's not the F-word that was going through my mind as I was doing this.

5:04


B.  Unnamed metcon

6 rounds for time of

10 One Arm Kettlebell Swings (to shoulder height, 5L+5R)

10 Deck Pistols (5L+5R) (sub 10 Deck Squats)
What's a deck pistol, you ask?  This:


Seeing as I can't do regular pistols, I had to sub this for deck squats.  It's the same thing, with two feet.  NOTE TO FUTURE SELF READING THIS FOR TIPS: I found it was easier for me once I took off my shoes.    I also rolled as far back onto my shoulders as I could and helped push myself back up with my hands, sort of like I was kipping up. Y'know, without the athleticism. 



I used a 55lb kettlebell and got done this in 6:53 


C. Sandbag 800M 65lb

The second one was far worse than the first.  I took multiple walking breaks.

5:34


Today was the first time The Boy came to a 6 a.m. workout with me.  He had fallen asleep way early last night and was up at 4:45 this morning.  Because he's a busy kid* and I didn't want him waking the entire house, I thought I would bring him along.

*"Busy kid" being a politically correct term for "refusing to ever just calm the fuck dow and let other people get some sleepn." 

As I noted on the Crossfit Regina blog:  The only thing less fun than a second 800m run carrying a 65lb sandbag at 6am in the morning is doing all of that while your 5-year-old yells “You’re supposed to run faster, Dad! That guy (Dana) is beating you!”

Back Squats / "Another Seven"

A. Strength = Back Squats 5-5-5


225
255
280 (PR)
The first four felt pretty good.  The last one was a bit of a fight, but I've struggled more squatting. 

B. Metcon = “Another Seven”
7 rounds for time – 75lb
7 Pendlay Rows
7 Power Cleans
7 Push Press/Jerk
20 Double-Unders

10:14

I wanted to get this done in sub-10 because if you do that, you do it with 95lbs next time.  Wait, that doesn't seem like much of a reward... 

Anyway, this WOD got real tough by the third round  Luckily, there were a relatively small number of reps, but it seemed like it took forever to get through those seven rounds. 

I'm much better at "Turkish Stay-Downs"

A. Turkish Get-Up practice 3-2-1-1-1

3x35
2x45

I successfully did 55 with my right arm, but couldn't get it with the left after two attempts. 

I like to believe my lack of competence at TGUs is endearing. 




B. 4 x 500m Row plus HSPU or DHPLU

Round 1 & 3 end with max strict Handstand Push-ups

Round 2 & 4 end with max Deadhang Pull-ups

Each round is scored separately. 

1. 1:47, 7 HSPU
2. 1:41, 3 DHPLU
3. 1:43, 8 HSPU
4. 1:45, 2 DHPLU

Hey, look, Project Deadhang is already paying dividends!

Actually, I was trying really hard on the rowing, so obviously that's going to affect one's ability to do deadhang pull-ups. 

Yeah, that's gotta be it. 

"Try not to hurt yourself, Dumbass"

Back at CFR a week after tweaking my back. 

A. Snatch Balance to moderate heavy single 3-3-3-1-1-1


Triples:
Bar x 3
95lb x 3
95lb x 3

My right shoulder was bothering me every time I tried to bring the bar back down to my shoulders, so I didn't want to go any heavier on the triples.   This could be the lingering effect from the jumping muscle-up debacle a little while ago, or I could just be getting old and broken down. 

Singles
115lb x 1
125lb x 1
135lb x 1 

My listed max for a one-rep squat snatch is 150, but this didn't feel like a "Set a new PR" kinda day.  More like a "Try not to hurt yourself, dumbass" day. 


B. Squat Snatch 3-2-1-1-1

95 x 3
115 x 2
125 x 1
135 x 1 - I actually did this twice.  The first time I caught it way high, and lowered myself into a squat.  Second time, I got under it better.
145 x 1 - I didn't fail on this, but this was basically a power snatch followed by an overhead squat. That doesn't count. 


C. Metcon = “Eight Minutes”

4 rounds, each round starts at 2 minute marks
6L + 6R one-arm Kettlebell Swings to shoulder height, choose KB (I chose 55lbs)
9 Goblet Squats with KB
12 Burpees

Done (untimed). 

I was done all of the rounds with 30 or 40 seconds to spare. 

This was a good, quick little metcon.   In the last round, I had thought I'd blast through the burpees like a man with nothing to lose.  But then, about six in, I got tired and started slacking off.  I had tons of time and no motivation to finish super-quick because I didn't need any time to rest since it was the last round. I got it done, but I got that shit done on MY TIME. 

Honestly, I may be the laziest CrossFitter on Earth, but have no way of empirically determining that.  You don't see that category represented at the "World Series of Exercise (copyright Drywall) do ya?
 

Project Deadhang

I want to be able to do more consecutive dead hang pull-ups, yet I don't want to spend very much time doing so.

For the next month or so I am going to go out to my garage each day (usually in the evening) and do one max set of deadhang pull-ups.  This will be in addition to any other CrossFit WODs I'm doing. 

I'll keep track of my results here to see if this small amount of effort results in any progress whatsoever. If I do get better at DHPLU, I would expect it would also help my kipping PLU. 

Day 1:   9 - Clearly, I have a lot of room for improvement.
Day 2: 10
Day 3: 10
Day 4: 11 - I was only wearing underwear and a T-shirt.  I wonder if that helped?
Day 5: 11 Barely. Day 6: 11
Day 7: 12

"I should just quit CrossFit & make an appointment to get vajazzled"

A. Squat Cleans 3-2-1-1-1  then two sets of 2x85% of your one rep max

3x135
2x155
1x175
1x195
1x205 PR

I felt like there was maybe a bit more room at 205, but I'm really happy to get it. 

I used 175 for the two sets of doubles at the end.  My back was still a little stiff from the high-rep snatches on Saturday, and this movement aggravated that a bit on the first set. 

Even though there was a little imaginary birdie on my shoulder telling me I should just skip the last set and avoid any chance of injury, I stupidly decided I needed to do it. 

In fact, I would have to be a colossal pussy to NOT do it, wouldn't I?  I mean, I should just quit CrossFit and make an appointment to get vajazzled.



Obviously, I failed on the second attempt and tweaked my back even further to boot. I'll probably have to sit out CrossFit until Thursday at the earliest, Because I'm a dumbass who doesn't pay attention to the warning signs his body is sending him. 

But at least I'm not a pussy, right? 


B. Handstand Push-Ups: 5-4-3-2-1

Done.  I did them all strict, except for the set of three.  I did those kipping, but I did extra to compensate.


C. Run 1km carrying a 20 lb medicine ball

5:25.  That sucked some pretty serious ass.

"Hope"

Same format as Fight Gone Bad, and it's just as awful.  I sure "Hope" I don't have to do this one again anytime soon. 

(Ha! I kill me.)

Three five-minute rounds, with one minute at each station:
-Burpees
-75 lb power snatch
-24" box jump
-75 lb thruster
-Chest to bar Pull-ups

I had a pretty good pace in the first round (88 reps, I think), but dropped off in the second (60) and third (55).  My goal was to maximize my reps on the burpees, snatches and thrusters.

203 total reps.

A unique but effective coaching style

Shae told me about this video. 



I'm really glad this guy wasn't around when we took that field trip to Shae's boxing club.  Given my ineptitude, Coach Kelly would have subjected me to a tirade that I'd probably be in therapy for. 

Beware black cats

As I was driving to the gym today, I saw a black cat cross the street about a block ahead of me.  I could have turned around and gone a different route to the gym. Even though I would like to avoid any bad luck at the moment, I was already short on time and I figured it was just a superstition.

Clearly I'm a dumbass...

A. Muscle-up practice

Yup, still can't do muscle-ups.  So I decided to practice jumping MUs, and it was going okay, until I lowered the box by -- I'm not exaggerating -- about two inches. 

Then, after a couple of unsuccessful attempts and one successful one, I had a bit of a mishap.  My right arm basically lost control and twisted behind my back and up toward my head, as I was still holding onto the ring. 

I freaked out a bit, not knowing how serious it was.  After the initial flash of pain and my subsequent profanity, it didn't appear to be all that bad, and I finished the other two parts of the workout. 

As I write this, the shoulder is a little stiff but I seem to have the full range of motion.  I'm icing it and taking it easy.


B. 250 double unders in as few sets as possible in under (10-minute time cap)

Since the clock was less of a factor in this one, as long as you can get under the 10-minute time cap, I decided to take good breaks between the sets and regain my breath so I could maximize the number of DUs in each set.  It seemed to work out well.  Consistently getting sets of 30+ double unders is better than I would typically expect.

7 sets.

Set # -> Total reps (including previous)
1.  48
2.  80
3.  116
5.  151
5.  186
6.  220
7.  250


C. 10-minute AMRAP - 20 sandbag lunges and 10 push-ups

The sandbags were held across the back. 

I completed the first round in under a minute and things slowed way down after that.

7 rounds exactly.  I wanted to get one extra lunge in at the end, but couldn't get the sandbag up in time.

Weighted Pull-ups and Breathing Ladder

A. Weighted pull-ups:  3-3-3
25, 30, 35(f)


B 1->15->1

Breathing ladder bell swings.

17:01

"Liz Like"

1 -> 10 reps of:
Burpees
Front squats (135lbs)
Ring Dips
 
14:14.  Started out fast, but slowed down considerably around the 6's or so. 
 
Later on in the WOD, the Boy decided he was going to join in on the burpees.  By that point, he was going considerably faster than me.  Still, it was fun to see.
 
Later, as we were heading out the door, he noticed the CrossFitter of the Year trophy and declared:
 
"I'mma turn five and win that shit."
 
 
I don't think he actually meant to say "shit," but he stumbled over a word and it came out sounding like it.  Still, Nolan and I found that hilarious.

“Understudy”

For total time, as a team of 3:

3 rounds of

8 Unbroken Power Cleans per person 

400M Run (run together as a team)

Rest 2 minutes

3 rounds of
8 Unbroken Thrusters per person
400M run (as a team)

Rest 2 minutes

By sled, move a total per team of 2000lb for 100M (men) or 1500lb for 100M (women).

I was a member of a reverse Three's Company team (two dudes, one gal).

Tristan and I used 135lbs for the cleans in Round 1, 95lbs for the thrusters in Round 2 and 100lbs for the sled drags in Round 3, which we quickly dropped down to 50, and started doing 50m relays rather than 100m round trips. 

Took us 54:25

Afterward,  the Boy (age 4.75) got to play around in the gym a bit.  He even busted out some sled drags...

But he prefers riding on the sled to dragging it. 

.

Isabel & Karen had a kid nobody likes

"Karabel": 10 rounds of 3 power snatch (135 lb) and 15 wall balls. 20 minute time cap. 18:32 rx'd.

Front squats are fun!!

This post's title comes from some whiteboard grafitti at CrossFit Regina left by an unknown optimist.

A. Front squats: 3-2-1-1-1

205x3
225x2
235x1
245x1
255x1 (FAIL)


B. Run 1,200m

I didn't feel very fast this morning.  5:10

Push Press/Double Unders then Russian Twists/Plank Hold

A. Five rounds for time: 25 Push Press 75lb and 50 Double Unders

13:54 

I probably could have upped my intensity on this one a bit and finished a bit faster. 


B. Core work = NOT for time:

3 rounds of: 25 Russian Twists with 35/25lb dumbbell, 1 min Plank hold

Done.  No fun, whatsoever. 

Spring Fling 2012

Official results


WOD 1: "JETHRO" (aka TYLER LOVES SNATCH)

Five minutes to a max single Snatch/Overhead Squat, rest one minute, five minutes to a max single rep of "The Bear."

I had no illusions of destroying the field on this.  My overhead squat is fairly good, but my snatch is mediocre. 

I had a lot of time to warm up for WOD 1 since I was in one of the later heats, so I did a lot of 135lb snatches. I decided to start a bit heavier than that in the competition. I think I started with 140, then went to 155. After practicing this week, I wasn't counting on snatching more than 150, but at this point I was having fun and decided to go for 160, which would tie my PR. Since the competition allowed for a lot of leeway when it came to pressing out, I got that.

At this point I still had a fair amount of time on the clock, so I thought I might as well go for 165. I got 165 (Snatch PR) with about 30 seconds left in the five-minute period.

I believe I started the Bear with 155. I'm not sure if I did any other weights before putting 180 on the bar.

I was able to do 180 with a lot of time left, so I thought "What the heck?" and put 205 on the bar.  (Spoiler alert: this is a dumb approach to take during competitions)I cleaned it, front squatted it, jerked it, back squatted it. I rested for a bit with the weight across my shoulders, and attempted a jerk. I let out a decidedly non-gangsta screech and failed the lift.

In retrospect, I should have gone a bit lighter... like, maybe 195. I am not complaining about how I did on this one, though. I was planning on only doing 150 on the snatch and 165 on the Bear, so I beat my total by 30lbs and got a new PR to boot.

With my total of 345lbs I got 14th out of 20 on WOD 1.

WOD 2.1: SHOTPUT (aka "FUUUUUUUUUCK")

I knew this would suck for me, and it did.

My two throws were very close to each other and far short of just about everyone else's. 

 thought they were 7.51 and 7.53m, but the official records use my 7.51 as the throw that counted, so I could remember wrong. If I'm not wrong, I would have placed18th, instead of the 19th spot that I was credited for since a dude from Winnipeg got 7.52.

WOD 2.2: 800 METRE RUN (aka TYLER AIN'T AS FAST AS HE THOUGHT HE WAS)

I thought I would do relatively well at this, but -- as it turns out -- pretty much all the dudes in Div 1 were fast and strong. Fuckers. They should pick one or the other.

My time of 2:55 (a PR, I might add) was only good for 17th place out of 20. That was a pretty jarring reality check for me once I learned that little piece of news. 

Still, this WOD was responsible for one of my favorite memories of the day:

Jarrett and I were in the same heat, along with Shawn and Big Nick S. Jarrett and I started out fast and I overtook him around 100 metres into the run. Still, I knew he was pretty close behind me because I could hear him. That's the worst feeling.

I should also mention that Jarrett has a nagging groin injury that helped keep him to my speed.

On the second lap of the 400m track, I avoided some puddles and, in doing so, gave up the inside track to Jarrett. He pulled up beside me and edged ahead as we were coming around the final turn. I put everything I had into catching up to him and we were neck and neck down the final stretch, each doing everything we could to beat the other.

He beat me by a nose (the official record says  his time was 2:54 but there was far less than a second between us). I was disappointed that I lost to him for the next three minutes.

Then I realized something: Jarrett was competing in Division 2. It didn't matter if he beat me.

Furthermore, I finished a lot faster than I would have if I wasn't trying to catch him, and I did finish just one second ahead of the guy in 18th place, so I have Jarrett (and his groin) to thank for that.



WOD 3: "LIVE WITH ROYCE" (aka TYLER FUCKING BLOWS IT)

Three rounds of a 400m run with a 65lb sandbag and 15 chin OVER bar pull-ups.

This event was responsible for another great moment that I will remember for a long time.  And it had absolutely nothing to do with me. 

The youngest competitor of the day, a 12-year-old kid named Mack from Yorkton's CrossFit Function, was finishing up the Div 3 version of the workout.  And, like what happened with Brad Flood's box jumps in 2010, the entire crowd was cheering him on as he finished and staggered into a hug from his mom, who was also competing. 

Here's a video of his last five pull-ups.  I saw this live and watched the video a couple of times, and I seriously get a little choked up every single time.



I would say my own personal memories of this WOD are not quite as fond.  This was the worst one for me, both in terms of how hard it hit me and how I failed to live up to my own expectations.

Going into it I actually thought I'd do okay. But, as it turns out, 65lbs is a lot of goddamn weight to carry for 400m.

What's worse is the fact that whatever I did diet-wise during the day, snacking on dried mango and a bit of beef jerky, didn't work and I started getting a cramp in my stomach on the first run. It didn't hinder me much on the first one, and probably not that much on the second, but I really felt it on the third.  On the second and third runs, I did have to take some walking breaks.  I also had some interesting conversations with myself.

By the time I got to the pull-up bar on the last round, I would guess I only had about 35 seconds left.  I pounded them out as fast as I could, but  I got a DNFF. I was two pull-ups short, which was good for 18th place.

Another thing that hurt was the pull-ups. The standard was that we had to get our chin through the vertical plane of the bar, so it could be seen on the other side (at least, that's how my judge interpreted it).

Frankly, I think this was a mistake to include this standard.

Chin over bar a hard enough thing to do without hurting yourself, and the CrossFit Regina pull-up apparatus ("Royce") is not completely stable. It wiggles and shakes a little when there are people swinging on it.  So, when you've got a bunch of other CrossFit psychos furiously banging out pull ups, it's easy to take a bar to the throat when you're attempting to satisfy a finicky judge.

I got called for a bunch of no-reps in the first round, at least five and maybe as many as seven. So on rounds two and three I made sure to get as much as my face over that bar as possible. As a result, there a couple of times I really slammed my throat on the bar, and one time I grazed my chin on it.

It actually bothered me quite a bit later on in the day, and I had trouble swallowing for hours afterward.

It's really my only problem with the entire event, but I would recommend to Aaron and Robin that they program either regular pull-ups or chest-to-bar instead of chin-over-bar in future events. Personally, that's the last time I'm going to do the chin-over-bar version, no matter what the WOD calls for.

Beyond my minor quibble with the pull-up standard, I thought this was a good, tough event that really tested a competitor's heart and fitness, which is all you can ask of a CrossFit WOD.

WOD 4: CLASSIC CROSSFIT (aka TYLER'S LAST CHANCE)

One minute at each of the following stations:

Wall ball

24" box jump

70lb bell swings

Double unders

Speed burpees

Going into this WOD, I was sitting in dead last in Div 1. I actually predicted this on the CFR website earlier in the week, but I gotta admit I was really hoping to at least beat a couple of guys.  I know I preach "If you wanna be a big dog, you gotta run with the big dogs" but it's still pretty hard on my fragile ego to be running at the absolute back of the pack. 

However, before WOD 4 I was in last place by three points, which meant I had to get at least 17th out of 20, and hope the dude in 19 got last if I wanted to beat even one guy.

My strategy on WOD 4 hinged on doing well on the double unders and hoping that there were some dudes who couldn't do them very good at all. I figured everyone would be pretty close on the box jumps, WB, and burpees.

Because I remember how bad the 70lb bell swings were in the final WOD from my first competition in Saskatoon, my plan was to rest that entire minute and enter the DU minute as fresh as possible. I figured, I could kill myself to get 15 swings, or I could rest and get another 20-30 reps in DUs. As it turned out, since my judge Trevor (of CrossFit Function) was yelling at me (he's actually a super nice guy), I did pick up the bell and do 10 swings, but I stopped well before the minute was done.

The DUs didn't go quite as well as I wanted, but I did manage to get an even 50 in them. I had time for some more but I kept tripping up on the rope.  

It was pretty amazing to see Nolan, who placed first in this event and second overall, do a minute straight of double unders.  This came after he did a minute straight (NO breaks) of wall balls, and another minute straight of box jumps.  He took a brief breather on the bell swings, but he probably still got at least 20  of them.

If Nolan weren't such an incredibly great guy, I would totally resent how awesome he is at CrossFit.  He is my CrossFit hero.

In the end, I got 13th place on WOD 4 with a score of 123.

My math actually had me at 126, which would have been good for 10th in the WOD, but I could be remembering my round totals wrong. I only saw the tally sheet briefly when Trevor had me sign it, and I WAS pretty destroyed by the WOD at the moment. (I should note that even if I WAS victim of erroneous math on the final WOD and the shot put -- and I very likely wasn't and am just remembering wrong -- it wouldn't have resulted in me finishing any higher than I did overall, since I was 11 points away from the next guy).

At the end of the day, I ended up in 19th place overall.

This was an extremely well-organized and well-designed competition and, despite my bitching and moaning about my own lack of success during the day, these events always remind me why I dig CrossFit so much.

Congrats to Robin and Aaron and all the volunteers and judges for making the day go so smoothly.   I look forward to another bottom three finish next year.